Let me start out by saying that being single isn’t a bad thing. The reason for this clarification is due to the fact that there are those in society who believe being single to be a bad thing, to mean that there is something wrong with those who are. There isn’t. There is a long list of reasons why a person could be single, one of which is – by choice! Shocking, I know. Why would anyone choose to be single? Well, I happen to have the answer to that.
After doing some soul searching (and research into other single people’s motives for leading a solo life) I have found a number of reasons why being single is to the benefit of the individual. I’m speaking to those who are single and hating it, because if you are looking to get out of singledom, you should embrace the alone, it’s the only way you’ll get out of it. I’m speaking to those who absolutely love being entirely self-sufficient and independent. Whether you choose to be single for a month, a year, or a decade, there are always perks.
You get to do what YOU want to do 100% of the time.
When you are in a relationship, you have to (well, you should) take your significant other’s interests and feelings into account. While this is an entirely joyous element of a healthy relationship, it can also get a little tedious when you and your significant other aren’t always on the same page when it comes to what to have for dinner or where to go.
When single, and I can personally vouch for this one, it’s pretty great to realize that you only have to take care of yourself – and who knows you better that you, right? If you want to order a pizza with pineapple and olives, you should! If you want to meditate for three hours just because, DO IT. The result of doing things that you like will incur in the following result…
You have the time to learn who YOU are and what YOU like, in yourself and in others.
While some of your hobbies are obvious, there are others that are hidden and are just waiting to bust out and play. The best thing, at least for me, about being single was the time to discover who I am without a significant other. Some of us have a tendency to put our significant other first and therefore put ourselves on the back-burner. I know I did it. When I became single again, the first thing that naturally happened was a journey of self-discovery.
Through learning who I truly am – what I like, dislike, prefer – I also learned what I do and don’t want in a significant other, which is SO important! Just like they say that you have to love yourself before others can love you, same goes for this.
While loneliness is inevitable, it teaches you what you miss and what NOT to compromise over.
Not going to lie, being single can sometimes feel like something is wrong with you, especially if you’ve been single for a long time. However, I’m happy to report that that feeling goes away. Nothing is wrong with you. What you should take away from loneliness, as I have heard others (and myself) have, is to examine what you miss. Do you miss having someone to talk to? Someone who will cook dinner? Make you laugh? Hold your hand? Guess, what – this is your innate system telling you what’s important to you, jot everything down and you have yourself a list of what you love most in a significant other.